What? Crazy? Me? I'm Not Crazy!
No matter how good our relationship with our partner is, there are always things that bug us about each other. This is perfectly normal and to be expected - unless, of course, you are clones of each other. Even if you are good about telling each other what bugs you, and even if you are good at responding to it, there is always room for improvement. So let’s take a little time this month to see if we can address each others pet peeves in a way that in and of itself won’t drive you crazy. Let’s be honest with each other, get a few things off of our chests, and set the tone for more easily clearing out future “you-drive-me-crazy” land mines in the relationship.
Now, send your crazy self over here for some ideas!
A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Altar...
I realized my Partner wasn't so perfect after all!!! OK, so maybe it's me who's not perfect - either way, you are driving me CRAZY!!!
We all have pet peeves and the strange thing is, we don't understand how any normal human being couldn't possibly see OUR way as the RIGHT way! After all, what man shouldn't put the toilet seat down in our society? And who doesn't like a tidy house free of stacks of things??? Whatever your issues are, we have good news - they are manageable!!
Let's get started with just a few though - but for fun, try this:
Sit down together and write out a list of your PARTNER's pet peeves and have them do the same for you. This will help each of you feel you are being heard - that your Spouse knows what drives you nuts. There may be a few to add to the lists for each of you and that's ok.
Then, each of you choose 1 or 2 or even 3 things that you think you could work on this month. Now, here's the trick - when you change your behavior, take a moment to promote it and celebrate it! Much of this is about perception - so if you wait around for your Partner to notice your hard work, you may be waiting a long long time. A simple....hey honey, you'll be happy to see that i did that thing i said i'd do....will go a long way!
This is all about helping your Partner be understood - not about the little things - but about kindness and giving back.
Crazy Ideas To Get You Started
- When your partner makes us a conscious effort to change something that bugs you, follow it with a hug and a kiss (or something more passionate).
- Give your partner a dollar every time they change a habit that irritates you.
- Plan an “I Will Drive You Sane” Day with your partner, where you both make a huge effort to do “bug free things” that make for household happiness.
- Talk to your partner as soon as you see them doing something that bugs you. Don’t wait and let it simmer. Start the conversation with something like, “Hey, I would really appreciate it if you…” or “I know you don’t mean to bug me, but when you do _______ it drives me nuts.”